Duck Duck Cougar?
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
I wish you could buy pregnancy test at the liquor store, it's the only place I feel comfortable being a disgrace because I know they understand why it happened...
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
Thanksgiving Shitshow: My grandparents found me passed out on the bathroom floor wearing nothing but a scarf made of toilet paper
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
Fantasizing about the apocalypse is fun and shit until the conditions that could lead to one suddenly seem feasible
Stop chatting and get in the fucking car. I didn't get my asexual ass out of bed just to watch you flirt and fail with someone you're never going to see again.
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