yo i just woke up i feel so weird, and the absolut is still fill, so is the 30, what the fuck did we drink last night man? And will you please come out of the bathroom.
Bro... we didn't even hang out last night??
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
50% drunk capacity currently
TSA literally pulled two bottles of whiskey out of my bag. Once he saw the leopard print socks and the mickey mouse tank, he put it back in my bag and said "Have a fun trip, man."
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
I just realized that you're going to be drunk for daylight savings time again. Godspeed.
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
Randomize
