It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
omg omg i just fucked paul. i need to stop doing this kind of thing.
wait, who's paul?
exactly.
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
I definitely hasselhoffed a taco bell burrito on my kitchen floor in front of my dad and little brother.
Just talked to Kate. She said I called her on Friday night. She said I was crying for 5 minutes because we were parked in front of a fire hydrant.
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
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