I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
Wine floats aren't as good of an idea as they seem
Slutty costumes are my most sacred holiday tradition! Wearing a not-slutty costume is like putting cheezwiz on a communion wafer.
I puked on myself in front of a customer. all. over. myself. thanks Saturday nights
Just walked into McDonald's and a bunch of fat girls gave me a look like I just entered their territory.
Sorry my hands just texted you
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
Some crack addled fool from the sketch ass motel behind the restaurant just gave me a flyer for an AA group when I was on my smoke break. I don't do mornings
I'm at the point in my life where I'm gonna sell my eggs for cash
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
next time you go get food at three am and leave a rando here can you warn me??? Also i tazed him. but it was just my little one so i think he'll be fine. bring me some fries.
Randomize
