There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
Note to self: Don't go home with a recent divorcee. Semen and tears.
You were visibly distraught that my boyfriend and I didn't have sex in your bed. You forced us to take your condoms.
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
you said "i met the love of my life tonight" and i said "me?" and you said "no, hummus"
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
sorry i got drunk at sunday brunch and force fed carrot sticks to your cat
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
Randomize
