Will you blow on my dice?
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
One of the bamboo sticks broke and impaled him. I think he's drunk enough that it shouldn't hurt until tomorrow.
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
Dude. I tried to hide my drunk wounds from my parents. Response: "we were young once" and "oh god, did I raise a drunk?"
You are beyond drunk wounds. You have drunk battle scars. A true veteran of the sidewalk
I sang Seal's Kiss From a Rose to my quesadilla
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
My professor congratulated me on turning my assignment in early. I didn't have the heart to tell him I only passed it in early cause my sex plans got canceled for the night.
Randomize
