Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
it says 'tasty bitch' in sharpie on my tits...
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
I woke up to an alarm on my phone that said "Buy Plan B" and then the guy offered me a hairbrush... which seemed polite at the time
When you pick me up at the airport, please have some sort of drugs on hand.
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
Randomize