Are you drinking alone?
no, i'm watching house
That doesn't count.
wtf, then i'm always alone
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
An accidental pregnancy to a guy with a trustfund is no mistake. It is a gift from god.
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
Pretty penis doesn't make up for awkward eye contact.
Taco Bell is better for you than cocaine, I promise.
Randomize
