Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
I was in the bathroom and her cat just looked at my penis with a profound hatred.
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
Is there a non-awkward way to tell a girl I work with that she looks just like my favourite pornstar?
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
Randomize
