I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
I just remembered that I did shots out of a gay mans crotch. And there's someone saved in my phone as "Miranda knows where my car is"
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
I would've fucked Winston Churchill - rode that D like I was going into battle.
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
Randomize
