You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
17 year olds will be the death of me.
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
He was running late for work this morning, so I helped him out by finding a matching pair of black socks. And I hated it. So I'm currently drinking and reminding myself of the reasons I will never get married.
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
You were sober bartending last night right?
Sorta. I remember you crying, ripping rose petals off the flower stem and slowly sprinkling them behind the bar at me and singing softly
Romantic
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
Randomize
