You work out of a Hotel?
I think I'm pregnant with his hipster baby. It keeps kicking my stomach to the beat of mgmt songs.
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
He made a toga out of my hot pink bed sheets and cracked an egg on his head. Then he proceeded to alphabetize our DVD collection, which was impressive because I'm 99% sure he couldn't have done that sober.
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
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