You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
1:45a: Maybe
2:05a: Probably
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
The bald guy bought me a shot so I chugged it and then walked out to the middle of the dance floor and told an old woman that might be your moms twin to bend it over...We didn't end on a good note though. Dude she stepped on my vans.
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
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