Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
you had me at cake vodka
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
These people don't understand my stages of drunk
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
What the hell did you do last night?
I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
Randomize
