Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
Randomize
