She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
Can I tell him I got herpes from your bong instead of from that guy who claimed to be an olympic diver?
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
You are currently doing Harry Potter spells with the turkey-baster...
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
Randomize
