Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(248): View more from Michigan

yo - did your mom get a boob job (I think she did)

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(303): View more from Colorado

Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward

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(937): View more from Ohio

I just saw a man salute the budweiser truck on the highway. I want to follow him and shake his hand.

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(314): View more from Missouri

just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle

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(720): View more from Colorado

Fun fact: Antibacterial soap will not take the combined smell of bbq sauce and vagina off your hands.

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(513): View more from Ohio

He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep

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(541): View more from Oregon

dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room

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(416): View more from Toronto

I just went into a strangers house to have a spoonful of sugar to cure my hiccups, wtf is wrong with me

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(208): View more from Idaho

He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.

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