after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
My sister was not impressed when she got here. I was standing in the doorway in my underwear drinking a beer. At 2pm. On a Monday.
Used my phone to vibrate 'eye of the tiger'. It's like Rocky is punching my nuts, but gently.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
I'm drunk enough to know I'm texting you and sober enough to know what I'm saying to you
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
He was trying to break into my apartment to get the coke he left last night, didn't engage parking break, so the van started rolling. yup, it's broken.
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
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