Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
You know that you're in a bad spot when the doctor puts you on 500mg of amoxicillin 4 times a day for ten days and puts refills on it...
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
Just got invited to a tree party by some random chicks. They're literally just sitting up in a tree with a handle of rum and a box of goldfish crackers and yelled at me as I was walking by...
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
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