How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
I totally straight up jacked your pants. I am so sorry.
For the first time in my 26 years of life, I'm washing jizz out of my ponytail.... High five yourself later.
Apparently asking your girlfriends roommate for a hand job when u craw into the wrong bed after a bottle of rum is "bad form".
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
why is there a dog in my house with your initials shaved in it's fur?
dude, i just woke up in a house i've never seen. i have bigger problems
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
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