You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
Jordan and I are drunk and barred out at the liquor store sitting in the awesome $70 Corona bench bargaining with the owner for a lower price, all while passing the Belvedere bottle between the two of us. Real life. College has down this.
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
My parents worry about me having parties when they go on vacation. Umm no it just means I'm drinking and smoking alone on the first floor of the house instead of the second
Hashtag Pathetic
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
This text constitutes a formal request for sexual congress under the terms of our Relationship Agreement.
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
So many questions...the two most important are, where the fuck is my booze and how did you even get the couch through the door?
Randomize
