Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
I don't know if it's the amount i drank last night or the number of taylor swift statuses on facebook but i feel like puking everywhere
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
"DO YOU LIKE FLYING KITES" WORKED AS A PICKUP LINE. SUCK IT.
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
If I get laid tonight it will 1.) Prove that the sex gods do in fact exist, and 2.) Show that I am one motherfucking badass bitch.
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
Randomize
