Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
What's a nice way of saying "You fell asleep, and I got bored, so I made out with your brother"?
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
I drank toilet water last night, I can't answer you because my phone is in rice.
I most definitely just found a video on my phone that I accidentally took... You can't see anything and all you can hear is me talking about how good your water was... And then I fed it to you... And used the word "eloquent" to describe it.
Growing a beard is gonna make smoking a pipe look so much more majestic
We had sex on a dog bed..
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
I know I swore I wouldn't go home with him, but he whispered that he had taquitos and you know how much drunk me loves taquitos.
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
True college students do jello shots in the library
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