he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
Definitely just found that pen in the microwave. What the fuck.
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
Randomize
