did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
We play beat the clock every morning. When the alarm goes off, she hits snooze and drops her panties. If I can't finish in time to beat the snooze, she jumps in the shower and I've gotta jerk off.
I'm still pretty stoned. There are mini rice cakes in my robe pocket to snack on in the shower.
Yeah to go race car driving with a 54 yr old gastroenterologist. I really wish you'd come to have that drink with me Wednesday
Btw. I have a sinus infection from doing cocaine in a portapotty at a Duran Duran concert. So, gimme a couple of days before y'all start the party.
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
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