We're facebook friends in real life
youre lurking in front of me
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
I ate a pepperoni off of someone's floor last night. We need to talk.
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
You kept saying we got to find the end of the rainbow, which turned out to be a box of lucky charms and Guinness in the bag of cereal
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
Randomize
