i told him that if he starts being sappy its friends = off. he called me jerkface and drew on me w permanent marker. im either in love w him or we are twelve.
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
i think it would be like really awesome if scientist could genetically engineer manatees to be like the size of goldfish so i could have one in my fishbowl and be like FUCK YEAH TINY MANATEE
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
Vodka, rum, moonshine, I don't care, just bring like 5gallons.
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
Randomize
