Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
she's about as cool as a sandpaper handjob.
what the fuck. my fiance told me she called our wedding band last night and told them to perform "best i ever had" for our first dance
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
On the couch having a debate with the dog over whether eating anothr sweet roll will make the hangover better or worse
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
At what point do you think my baptist preacher of a father will clue in that my brother "bringing a foreign exchange student" for thanksgiving means "bringing his european boyfriend and they'll probably fuck every night" for thanksgiving?
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
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