I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
well you can't waste a boner
I wonder if there will ever be a day where I don't find lisps really really hilarious.
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
Ohh god. I'm so nervous. This is terrible. He just introduced me as "the best girlfriend of his life" and Jenny as his "sexual roomate"
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
Randomize
