i just farted in a meeting....took me completely by surprise.
so you made the shocked face and they caught you.
yup.
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
it glows. i had to have it.
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
My most recent midlife crisis involved eating a doughnut in 30 seconds but taking 5 minutes to do half a shot of whiskey, then deciding I wasn't going to finish it.
Had to walk of shame past Westminster Abbey this morning. Pretty sure a Japanese tourist took a photo of me.
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
You rolled over grabbed my crotch and said "that's my waffle." I'm sleeping on the couch next time.
Randomize
