That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
My dad assaulted a TSA agent this morning. Shut down airport security. Don't tell me that your family is embarrassing.
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
I legitimately had a champagne shower last night at a rave. I was also carrying around two bananas in my pockets like guns. Drunk doesn't even. Begin to explain My night.
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
Halfway through missionary I realized I was partially laying on his sleeping dog and idk that just kinda ruined it for me sooo
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