you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
I just balanced a full glass of chocolate milk on my left boob. Don't think i've ever been more proud.
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
Randomize
