Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
The dog just did a longer kegstand than anyone at the party
Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now.
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
There is a slip-n-slide in the hallway and a girl just did it topless cuz I told her it was my birthday. Where are you?
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
I figured you were on something. You're way too happy right now to be sober
idk i was trying to watch Fuller House and you got up out of a dead sleep, just in your boxers, said "no more Dave Coulier" and walked out to the living room and unplugged the router
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
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