So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
The taxi driver was cool until you left. He then started blasting enya and telling me I look like I need another line.
Tell your boyfriend I'm sorry for ruining his vein. I'm never drawing blood drunk again.
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
Boobs are out for the taking
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
She has also never texted me first which I think might be a tell-tale sign she wants me to die alone.
When are your genitals available?
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
Randomize
