Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
i'm surrounded by gay midgets. not sure if i'm bragging or asking you to come rescue me. wait for follow up.
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
I just remembered that last night I ate nachos off of someone else's table with a stranger
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
My night just got really weird. In a sit down stall bathroom at this nice resturaunt and this guy walks in as I rip a humongous porcelain-splitting fart. Well, I hear him stop for a second. He then opens the door to the stall next to mine, sits down and says, "player two has entered the game."
Did you win?
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
I made a joke about The Hemingway being a really boring sex position where you blandly describe all the action and then kill yourself after you orgasm. He stopped responding. I've GOT to stop talking to everyone like they're you.
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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