I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
For once I'd like to have a Taco Sunday without having some random drunk chick flee my house half naked and in tears.
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
my roommate just showed up covered in dirt, drunk....with a whole ice cream cake that says "it's a girl".
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
Food poisoning on first date... Still rode the mechanical bull like a champ
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
My uterus just tried to get me to buy a tub of cookie dough
Randomize
