Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
I just realized my life is a timeline of drunken injuries.
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
I'm chatting with a girl missing a front tooth. I find it quite distracting. I'm sure you have deduced what bar I'm drinking in on this monday night.
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
Oh, fuck yeah. I swear I came with every bite. Not even joking. Messiest meal ever.
Wow, thanks for ruining pizza for me. I didn't think it was possible.
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
Randomize
