And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
So it turns out there are pros and cons to having a broken wrist. Pro: I can give amazing blowjobs with my left hand. Con: I just had to open a packet of crisps with scissors.
I stole a road cone for their 13 yr old son. Apparently I told him to put Christmas lights on it, and "treat her like a lady."
I don't have nearly enough visine for the dryness from sticking my head out the window on the freeway for 20 minutes. Child lock me next time.
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
We had to push you home in an abandoned shopping trolley. You thought you were in a pirate boat and kept yelling "AVAST, ME HEARTIES".
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
You'd think that a rotation of two 30 year old men could keep me satisfied... WHY ISN'T THERE A MAN THAT CAN KEEP UP WITH MY HEALTHY SEXUAL APPETITE?!
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