Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
Seriously. Texted me 4 times and that didn't wake me up so he nicely called and left a voicemail saying he WOULD call me 8 times. So when he called back I answered.
Why are your underwear on my dining room table?
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
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