Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
Can we agree to not tell mom about this?
This isnt even the most disappointing thing i know about you.
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
Don't mind me. My boyfriend is carrying me because I'm broken not because I'm drunk.
It's not even 9:30 yet..
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
I threw up in 4 different Starbucks across the city before 9 am.
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
Randomize
