Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
found an unmarked box of photos in the garage, they were from when my parents first got together. It was fun laughing at their ridiculous eighties outfits and hairstyles, until I found a pic of my dad. naked. with a boner.
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
I was giving him a blow job in the kitchen, but it was uncomfortable. so i took the oven mitts and used them as knee pads.
Don't tell me i'm not fucking resourceful.
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
I asked if I could borrow some condoms. She referred to herself as "a soup kitchen for whores".
That which doesn't kill you gives you an excuse to get shitfaced later
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
Someone who makes you cum so hard that you have an asthma attack is clearly your soulmate
What are you, a fucking toaster ?
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