Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
Dude a guy just showed up with alcohol and a bag of double cheese burgers. I think I found my future husband.
you wouldn't come out from under your bed because you said there were six-armed bears everywhere.
ohhh that explains the pepperonis I found in my sock drawer this morning...
no it doesn't.
I was just handed a mimosa the size of my head. Stay tuned.
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
Based on the fact my iPad is covered in pizza, I'm going to assume I ate pizza last night
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
'valentine' just autocorrected to 'cake robe' in my phone
I think that summarizes my life up pretty accurately
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
Randomize
