What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
I bet your mom's never met a girl who's thrown up at the presidential inauguration before though.
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
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