So some sort of safe sex group just flash mobbed the bar by putting condoms over people's beers.
They left screaming as a hale of lubbed up condoms rained into their hair.
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
The psychic I saw today told me NOT to text the guy I haven't heard from yet since our first date this weekend b/c it wouldn't go anywhere...Miller light said otherwise. Miller light > Cleo
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
I’m going to lick a fucking door knob when this shit is all over
Probably Waffle House
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