I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
captain&coke to the library. STAT. this is an emergency. this is not a drill. I repeat: THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
Yeah. I don't know. I'm just gonna show up at her place on valentines day with a jock strap, box of chocolates, and rose clenched between my ass cheeks with "be mine" written across my glorious man titties.
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
Is it bad that I'm using the photo I took for my fake ID as my linkedin profile pic?
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
Dude I just woke up naked on the floor with my dick in a boot. Legit in a fucking boot. I also have no idea where I am.
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
Randomize
