you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
quitting drinking is the number 5 new years resolution but number 4 is enjoying life more which one do you think im going to pick
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
You haven't puked in my sink in over a year.. Youre coming over this weekend
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
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