Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
I think if I set up a series of baby gates up the stairs each one more difficult to undo then the last that should be able to stop your drunk vagina.
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
let me just inform you that suppository-ing xanax is glorious
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
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