Dude, the girl i fucked last night left wearing my high school musical shirt you bought me. she also left her panties here though.
The one with Zac Efrons face on it? You definitely got the short in of the stick. i'd rather have the shirt
fuck. yeah me too. i don't even think these panties would fit me
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to hit on someone with another guy's semen in your hair. not even at ihop.
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
I'm giving random strangers at the bar sips of my fishbowl, then telling them I have Ebola. It's a fun night.
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
people need to understand when I say I don't want to drink anymore that doesn't mean tempt me with another bottle of Jose Cuervo.
Randomize
