On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
Teeth make me feel like a dinosaur. Can you feel yours?
You know what it feels like? It feels like I'm in that prison from the dark knight rises. That's what being a virgin in college feels like.
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
Those nachos came to me in a dream
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
Lady at the airport across from me just pulled a cat out of her bag. can't deal with this right now..
Randomize
