Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
My New Years Resolution is to come up with a new resolution monthly. January: decrease my shotgunning consumption speed to 7 seconds or less.
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
the raccoons are back...
Randomize
